Fish is Fragile

                          My roommate Season bought four 「Africa Prince」home last Sat.

She's bored to stare at me while coming back home I assume. Anyway, animals are good accompanies to kill time.

I had some fishes two or three years ago. But colored ones. I had sent them to death due to careless watering and since then all animals except HUMAN are out of my capacity and tolerance to live with...

She bought them back in chanting spirit, yet my past cruel experience made me indifferent to these new family members.

Like a saying, you can never be naive once you grow up. I knew they gonna die, soon. But I had no right to affect others enthusiasm, and therefore I acted properly.

It's never too late to love them under Season's influence of . She says 「be nice」to them in the morning and greets them when coming back, even before saying hi to me.

I treat them like Untie looking after nephews, not out of love but responsibility, I turned to act the same like Season did. Say bye-bye and hi, and watch them playing with water. They look like nerd sometimes while swimming along the glass wall, maybe seeing themselves at reflection is out of their understanding? Anyway, they amused me in that way.

It was yesterday, I saw the water in the tank is dirty, but was too afraid to refill it due to the past psychological shadow. Season came back and I watched she carefully using a small plastic cup to take these fishes out. Some of them are naughty, I then helped her with fears of hurting any one of them. Thank-god, They all been taken out soundly.

As I believed the rest work would be easy to complete and left the scene...no more than two mins, Season screamed aloud as if were bitten by snake.She stood against a corner of wall, with trembling finger pointing to the floor, saying in a crying mood: look! one of the fish 「jumped out」.I saw a poor little thing turned its body ups and down on the dirty floor, its mouth was on and off wanting a dip of water.

Season was still trembling, stood still without knowing how to save the scene, which in turn, lead me too cool to be a girl - rolling up my sleeves as man! I had no compassion nor pity to pick it up , the dying life. I did 「caught」it up and send back to her「palace」

However, the body shake the fish had while in my hand came my dream last night.

An ominous dream which crowds of fish jumped on the ground fighting to live and countless black sticky fishes climbed all over my body woke me up at 6am.I dare not to stand up, checking the reality outside the living room.But I trust my dream--when dreamt something bad, it's almost right.

Season always wake up earlier than me, and when the sun rose at 8am, while stepping out of my bedroom to wash up, I was of no surprise to get her notice that the little poor fish died.

It made me sick anyway to see the dead fish floating above a separate cup.

So fragile to shed a eyesight onto it.

I ate Vegie set all day, and now, I'm ready to see her companions running deadly to meet her in haven.

It's only four days she lived. If to human, how old she lived? My prince...Gee, R.I.P

The Chung King Mansion

The old Chinese saying goes 「The more wit, the less courage」

I did exactly the same while landing my feet in HK.

Or else I can blame is HK director Wong Kar-Wai's film 「Chung King Express」

Too much fantasies inside the mansion, the drunk love-loser, the secret womanizer, the innocent kids drug carrier, the dirty deals thirsty lust of love... Even the dim lights lured me to make the crazy endeavor living inside, yes, I did book five days stay-in and expectations are high.

My uncle's students in Polytechnic University picked me up in the airport and sent me there. In the mid-way, we had some chitchat, Tracy and his just married wife bet I’m going to stay in, they said your appearance and air of personality explain everything, for sure you will stay. I don't know how to react then. Honestly, I was too timid and uncertain to answer this unknown town.

But the sunshine is ultimately bright to some extent almost piercing my eyes. Oh, the coastal city, the trees are coconuts and banana ones, the leaf is big to cover my entire face...the double-decker is grand inside, and quiet...everything is different from Beijing, esp. the loss if my dearest Beijing accent. The Cantonese sounds like birds-talk -- soft and fast. A sense of incapability to decode overwhelmed me that I was resistant to talk for days just to familiarize the local language.

My Chung King Day started on 2012 Aug 25, how could I forget my life's 「last big leap」which I planned for my later part of life. -- given by the messy life's in Beijing, the complicated relationships and friends circle...all made me breathless and hopeless to survive in. I love them and it was just because i want to keep the best fresh, I'd leave to live the memories, for those good people. It was too perfect having that much, everything reached to the tipping points which if we're more; it does no good to both.

Talking about the mansion, I was suggested by my accompany Tracy that not opening the door even the man is the hotel manager, not going outside alone though downstairs are hundred of shops, malls await to explore. The last word he told me is “Call 999 should you feel unsafe, since I may away from lab sometimes...” Which for me, this is a statement saying don't bother me anymore for god sake you picked place living inside.

I forgot the hotel name, but remember its in E13 which for me, sounds like a lucky number, but ominous for most westerners I suppose.

I knocked the doorbell with Tracy aside, he murmured don't make any eye contact with other dweller, speak less, move fast. His words made me laugh, as though it’s in Wong Kar Wai film that I was the brave heroine and he is a timid guy.

Then the door opened, behind which a huge fatty guy is, the strong curry smell in a sudden brought me back to India, when last May I travelled alone after Biz trip. The smell assures me by a sweet smile. The hotel manager checked my passport, knowing I went to his home country, he smiled back, saying 「Madam, welcome to HK small India, anything will be OKAY! Velllllllly Okay」(You got what I mean should you've been travelled in India: the more Okay, the more problems hide behind... )

I got the key and he took it to demonstrate how to open，lock-inside as if i was an idiot not knowing common sense. I listened carefully out of respect. Given the circumstances of the hotels inside the building, what advanced lock can you expect... He also shows how to turn on the light, the shower power and lastly brought me to a dark corner where I can serve myself a drink of instant coffee and red tea. Like he said, the water should be better than India, at least the 「call of nature」occurs in patterned manner.

The room is small, a total of five to six square meters with a bed closely placed beside the wall. And there's a small TV on, broadcasting India news or any language but Mandarin. I was sort of in India I told myself for amusement. The toilet is just opposite to the door, that's to say, when you open the door, the wet toilet welcomes you with a strange smell, and when stepping inside, you can barely make a-two steps-walk... One is enough to place your feet beside the bed, and if you want to make the second step, step on the bed, northwards to a prison like window, from which, the birds view makes you tremble seeing so many cheap air conditioners and cooking fans run downstairs, let alone the oily window frame... I swore I almost puked... The other four days later, I never look at it.

The soundproof wall proofs nothing, I could hear my left neighbor taking in India with his girl friend in a state of flirting, and I could hear the right neighbor bag from US complaining the tiny bed. Not in a biased way, but honestly, for people from US eating extra Big Mac, which measured as triple extra Big Mac in HK, the Chung King Mansion may not have a single room to fit you in. The India hotel manager was pissed off by his relentless complain, and screamed in his duck India English dispelled them out!

Thank god, apart from this, the place is decent. At least I had hot water to shower, which I overheard in an elevator from another dweller saying that he'd three days cold water just two floors below mine.

The five days flow fast, soon after that I moved to my first apartment in Tai Wo, NT. Tracy helped me move out, he was amazed I felt comfortable not complaining anything. The hotel manager said he'd suppose I was a Japanese girl because Chinese girl seldom dare to step in this mysterious kingdom, the Chung King Mansion for locals are dirty, messy and insane, he stressed, praising my appreciation to India culture and beliefs. I all took it as compliment and proofs of my courage dealing unfamiliar living.

Tracy was uncomfortable staying any minutes long I can tell, and there I said farewell to Chung King Mansion.

The fantasy of Chung King Mansion ends at Nanthan Rd 33-44 -- My first “Home” in Hong Kong.

Bye bye strangers in 7-11 saying「 Hi lady」, bye bye The Standard delivery mam who brought me the first free newspaper in the town to feel the city's pulse

How to not love the mansion that embraced lonely sprit hunting lucks in the unforeseen bustling town? The nest for a drifting Chinese girl, who has faint dream as her sole accompany.